I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
