i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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