lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
