I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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