He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I have aggressive nipples.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
