there was a trapeze. enough said
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
