Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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