Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
is wine microwaveable?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
My feet surprised me
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