I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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