i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
