she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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