eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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