Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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