conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
drinking out of a sandbucket again
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
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