Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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