He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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