I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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