We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
