I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
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