Whoa Z and x make the same sound
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I'm getting married
To pizza
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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