We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
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