Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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