how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
