how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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