Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
