I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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