I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Naked. naked and bneed help.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize
