these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
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