Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
