Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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