You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
