I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Randomize