If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i think my mom watched the whole time
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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