I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
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