I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
