I cockslap morals
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
