I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
foreskin is a definite game changer
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
