if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
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