dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
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