there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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