whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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