I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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