just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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