i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
