You're a womanizer and a bitch.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
