I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
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