So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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