my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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