I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
