3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
